


The Moments In Between

by PeggyPincurls



Category: Agent Carter (TV), Captain America (Movies), Captain America - All Media Types, Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Alternate Universe - Everyone Lives/Nobody Dies, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Artist Steve Rogers, Awesome Peggy Carter, Bucky Barnes & Peggy Carter Friendship, Bucky Barnes Feels, Bucky Barnes Returns, Clint Barton & Natasha Romanov Friendship, Domestic Avengers, Domestic Fluff, Everybody Lives, F/M, Fluff and Angst, Modern Peggy Carter, Not Captain America: Civil War (Movie) Compliant, Peggy Carter Lives, Protective Natasha Romanov, Protective Peggy Carter, Protective Steve Rogers, Steve Rogers Feels, Steve Rogers and the 21st Century, Team as Family, Time Travel Fix-It, Warm and Fuzzy Feelings
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-12-23
Updated: 2017-01-06
Packaged: 2018-09-11 10:23:38
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 4,950
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8975911
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PeggyPincurls/pseuds/PeggyPincurls
Summary: All of my fics are in the same headcanon/universe, but not everything that happens fits into a particular story.  So this is where the extra puzzle pieces will go--silly things and general one shots, all taking place along the timeline begun in "The Girl With A Star-Spangled Heart" which my brain is already calling "Star-Spangled-verse" because it's my brain and I've not had enough caffeine.  Blame WickedKitteh for most of the tomfoolery because, happily, she doesn't let me stay serious too long. Nothing here is in order, but I will at least attempt to note where it would have fallen in the Star-Spangled timeline.  Mostly this is just Steggy fluff, WinterWidow, the friendship between Peggy and Bucky, or humor, because those things all make my heart lighter, and maybe yours too.





	1. Just Use The Rabbit (100% The Fault of the Williams Sonoma Catalogue)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is 100% the fault of one of my favorite holiday traditions (the Hater's Guide To The Williams Sonoma Catalogue). I also like to try to write holiday themed stories, as they cheer me up (I dislike the holidays and wish I had a dysfunctional crew of Bucky and Natasha around to lighten me up, or a Steve to share the wine with). 
> 
> Brooklyn, by the way, is my perfect adorable imaginary baby and I wish I owned him.

"Bucky, just use the Rabbit," Natasha sighed, a wad of red-stained paper towels in her hand.

" _No_ , damn it," Bucky Barnes declared. "I am a _man_."

"You are making a mess," Natasha countered, not that that needed pointing out. "Why don't you just let Peggy do it? She's the only one in the house who isn't a ridiculously overpowered super soldier and thus least likely to continue making the mess that you are _now making worse_ , give me that thing."

Bucky quickly snatched the bottle he was holding out of Natasha's reach. "No, damn it! I can get this one."

In the other room, Steve Rogers kissed Peggy Carter's temple. "Now I know why you suggested putting down the cheap vinyl tablecloth liner. And why you bought all those bottles of crap wine and hid the good stuff. He's broken two already."

"They'll get bored eventually," Peggy promised serenely. "Or Natasha will take the corkscrew away from him. Most likely the latter. Just do me a favor, darling, and keep Brooklyn out of there for a while, would you?"

"Roger that." 

As if on cue, an excited scrabbling of claws on the wooden floor heralded the arrival of Brooklyn, who had heard the shouting and swearing that meant Uncle Bucky was over to play and had come running to see what the commotion was all about.

"Whoops!" Steve said cheerfully, bending over to intercept the puppy and scoop him up before he could race into the kitchen. "Nope. Sorry, buddy, but Mumma says you can't go in there or else you'll track wine all over the carpet."

Brooklyn, unperturbed by the interruption of his journey, panted happily, running in place in Steve's arms, such was the force of his excitement. 

"Do _not_ let him shed all over your shirt, Steven Grant Rogers!" Peggy called from the dining room, where she had gone to set up the trays for dinner.

"Which do you want, Peg? Wine on the carpet or dog hair on my shirt?" Steve ruffled the dog's headfur, adding, "Silly Mumma."

"Good point. Just use the lint roller."

Brooklyn yipped, and Steve dropped a kiss on his little head. "No, not on you, on Daddy. Your fur can stay on because we have company."

He peeked around the kitchen doorframe to find that Natasha and Bucky had called a ceasefire and were now sitting on a clean corner of the stained vinyl tablecloth liner, drinking wine that they'd poured from the two bottles whose necks Bucky had snapped trying to uncork into coffee mugs. 

"He's going to clean it up in a minute," Natasha promised Steve, shooting an amused, dark glare at Bucky. 

Bucky sipped wine serenely out of a mug imprinted with Steve's shield. "I am a _man_."

"You are an idiot," Natasha muttered, but her hand was resting affectionately on Bucky's knee as she sipped her wine from a mug that said _Stark Industries_.

"Where's the third one?" Steve asked, seeing more wine on the liner than could have come from two broken bottles. Natasha shook her head, quickly, no. 

Luckily, the cleanup proved easy thanks to Peggy's foresight with the tablecloth liner. A quick swipe of the mop afterward and the broken bottles in the trash and all was well. 

"Hey, Brooklyn!" Bucky said, handing his wine to Natasha so he could reach for the puppy in Steve's arms. "Merry Christmas, pal. C'mere. Tasha, where are the treats I brought him?" he asked as Brooklyn craned his little neck to lick his chin.

"Hidden from you both until after dinner," Natasha said firmly, although she reached to pet the pup as well. 

Peggy had the chafing dishes set up in the dining room, and Steve put his arms around her from behind. "You're a genius," he said.

Peggy laughed, reaching to caress the back of his neck. "You didn't think I was about to do any serious cooking, did you? Bless catering."

"And vinyl tablecloth liners." He kissed her hair. "Wine?"

"Please," Peggy said, leaning affectionately back against him. 

"There was _malbec_?" Bucky asked incredulously, coming into the room with Brooklyn circling his feet and Natasha's in a mad frenzy of delight at all the company. "How come I'm drinking this crap?"

"Did you think I would let you break a bottle of anything good?" Peggy asked from Steve's arms, gesturing with her glass. 

"How did you know I was going to break any of them?" Bucky countered. 

Natasha rolled her eyes and answered for Peggy. "Because you don't use the _Rabbit_."

"I don't _need_ an electric bottle opener, Tasha," Bucky shot back. "Who even _gave_ you guys that pretentious thing?"

" _Barnes_ ," hissed Natasha, " _we_ did."

Falling silent, ears pinking, Bucky accepted a glass of the malbec almost sheepishly, his metal fingers clinking against the glass because he'd covered his glove in cheap wine trying to open the other bottles. 

Steve, arms still around his darling, kissed her cheek and gave her a squeeze.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am aware that there is more than one...electric...household item that goes by the brand name of "Rabbit". I only own the one that opens wine bottles, though. What, did you think I was talking about something else? Honestly, what would Steve say if he knew you were thinking such things?
> 
> *looks over shoulder* ...Steve?
> 
> Oh dear, please excuse me, I've got to go get an ice pack. Who even knew someone's ears could get that pink?


	2. Salvio Hexia

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You'd _think_ you know exactly which houses the Avengers would be sorted into should they attend Hogwarts, but only the Sorting Hat knows for sure.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Another "extra piece" that is the result of a larger fic ("Many Happy Returns", as yet unposted) along the Star-Spangled Timeline. 
> 
> "Salvio Hexia" is a spell of protection from curses.

"Peggy," Steve said, "I love you more than anything in the world."

She glanced at him guiltily, knowing what he was about to add.

Steve curled his pillow around his head with both hands, squinting. "But can you please turn out the light. I'm exhausted, and I'm worried about you. You've been staying up so late this week."

"I am not worried about myself," Peggy said crisply, "I am worried about _Buckbeak_ and I wish to know that he is all right before I go to sleep."

Steve, clad in a worn white t-shirt that was softened from repeated washings, his blond hair adorably tousled, reached for where his girlfriend was sitting up alertly in bed next to him in her nightgown, winding his arms around her waist and trying to pull her down into his embrace. "Buckbeak is going to be fine, Peggy. All of Hogwarts is going to be fine, I promise--"

Peggy's response to this was to close her novel (around her index finger, to hold her place) and rap Steve on the head with it--gently, and it was a softcover, but her voice was stern all the same. "Steven Grant Rogers, if you spoil these books for me--"

"There are _four other books_ after this one," Steve said through gritted teeth, tugging on her and not bothering to smooth his hair, more tousled now from the impact of the book. "You ran right out and got them after you finished the first one, and you can tell from the covers that the school is still standing. Come. To. _Bed_."

Peggy made a big show of putting a bookmark in the paperback, setting it gently on her nightstand beside her lamp as though it were a delicate piece of treasure, then settling down huffily and pulling the covers up to her shoulders. "You're such a bloody _grump_ when you are tired."

"Thank you. Thank you. I love you. I love you so much," Steve murmured gratefully, burying his face in her hair. "Put out the light. Please put out the light."

Peggy did so with a thrust of her arm and a deft snap of her fingers, and then she lay stiffly in Steve's arms as he dozed off. Just as he was about to succumb to slumber, she asked in a small voice,

"But they will save Buckbeak, won't they? I know time travel is a bit of a sticky wicket, I know this better than most, but--"

"Go. To. _Sleep_ ," Steve ordered in the voice of the Captain, silencing her with a kiss so hard it was almost a punishment and then winding her so hopelessly in his arms that she had no chance of reaching the book on the nightstand.

**

"Ewww!" Darcy Lewis chirped sweetly as she saw the shadows under Steve's eyes. She was looking comfortable and cheerful in a t-shirt and jeans, arranging doughnuts in the conference room on a tray for a morning meeting to talk about what tech needed upgrading. "What happened to you? You look like your friend Sergeant Guyliner, Cap."

This was greeted with a sound that was rarely heard anywhere in the S.H.I.E.L.D. building--a genuine, deep belly laugh from Natasha, who was already seated, while Bucky sat back in his chair indignantly. "What the hell does 'guyliner' mean? Is she talking about me?"

"You have very artfully broken blood vessels in your bruised eyelids, babe," Natasha promised Bucky, stroking his metal shoulder through his charcoal-colored thermal shirt. "I would need makeup for that."

"Oh, _shut up_ , Nat," Steve hissed, and this only made the Widow laugh harder because Steve rarely spoke so harshly to her or to anyone. "This is your fault, this is all your fault."

"I told her she would like them," Natasha said triumphantly, sitting back and folding her arms across the chest of her navy-blue hooded sweatshirt. "What's she up to? _Goblet_?"

" _Prisoner_ , and I hate you," Steve said wearily, dropping into an empty chair. "She won't go to sleep at a reasonable hour, tosses and turns worrying about the lives, limbs and permanent records of imaginary students and fantastic animals, and I hate you so much I don't even want to look at you right now."

Now both Natasha and Bucky were laughing. Steve glared at them. Darcy skipped over with a chocolate-frosted donut, white stripes of vanilla frosting dribbled across it. "Awww. Here, Cap. Have a donut."

"I don't want a donut. I want a good night's sleep," Steve muttered, taking the donut and biting into it almost savagely anyway. A flake of vanilla frosting fell on the collar of the white polo he was wearing beneath his blue t-shirt.

"Speaking of Carter, where is she?" Natasha asked, looking around. "Why aren't you together?"

Steve's eyes narrowed, almost glowing with rage as if there were hot coals behind them. "She told me she'd be along in five minutes. Three guesses what she's probably doing."

Peggy chose this moment to walk briskly into the conference room, looking incredibly calm. "Good morning, all. Oh, Darcy, did you bring donuts? What a love you are." Patting Steve's shoulder as she passed him--his blue eyes flickered in response to his darling's touch, unable to completely hang on to his ire at her when she was present, looking very pretty in a mint-green dress with a flared skirt and a yellow-striped cummerbund, hair styled impeccably--she circled the table to the counter and selected a jelly donut. "Mmm."

"Feeling better, Carter?" Natasha asked beatifically, ignoring the warning look Steve shot across the table at her. 

"Yes, for now," Peggy responded. "Buckbeak is saved, and Sirius Black is a free man. You are right, these books are a super wheeze."

"Knew you'd get a bang out of them," Natasha said smugly, while Steve let his head drop to the table with a groan. Natasha smirked. "And don't listen to Rogers. He was pestering me with questions the entire time he was reading them. 'How does Parseltongue work? What's the difference between a Patronus and an Animagus? What's a horcrux?' It was great."

"What is a horcrux?" Peggy asked as she sat down and leaned forward in interest, eyes lighting up.

" _No_ ," Steve begged loudly, lifting his head. "For the love of all the gold in Gringotts, not yet. Please. I haven't slept all week, and every time she yelps at a new story development Brooklyn charges in thinking he's got to protect his mumma from Dementors and it takes almost a half an hour to put him down again. I am so tired I can hear colors. Please. Natasha. Don't start."

Clint Barton poked his head into the doorway, sunglasses atop his gelled hair. "Is Stark here yet? Am I late?" Blinking at Steve, he added, "Why does Rogers look so mad?"

Peggy, for her part, was looking very sympathetically at her Captain. "Oh, Steve. We're only teasing you. Have some coffee."

"I don't want any coffee," Steve grumbled, squinting his eyes shut. "I don't need to stay _up_ , I need to _sleep_."

Bucky was laughing so hard he had to get up and pour himself water from the pitcher Darcy had thoughtfully provided. Sipping, he said, "Awww. Carter learned how to cast _Crucio_ on Steve."

Natasha laughed wickedly while Steve's eyes shot back open. "For the love of...darn it, Buck, not you, too."

Bucky grinned angelically. "Read 'em in lockup. After you and Carter brought me down."

Steve goggled, while Peggy's eyebrows disappeared almost into the carefully styled front swoop of her hair. 

Natasha smiled and winked at Peggy. "He's telling the truth. I was able to get him to let them adjust his medication by promising him I'd bring him _Half-Blood Prince_."

"She brought it," Bucky said triumphantly. "And the meds were OK. We only had to adjust them maybe one more time before I got out."

"Are you sure you're not a Slytherin, Miss Romanoff?" Darcy asked amusedly. "That's pretty mean."

"It is _clever_ because I am a _Ravenclaw_ ," Natasha informed Darcy patiently.

Steve clapped a hand over his eyes. Peggy was watching in amused interest.

"Well, how ever would you know what House you would belong to?" she asked in innocent curiosity. "We can sit here and conjecture all we like, but there's no way to really know."

Steve, who sensed the impending suggestion, crossed his arms in front of his chest and then threw them out on either side of himself as though he were calling a runner safe at home plate. "No. No. _No_ \--"

It was too late. Bucky was already out of his chair, Natasha was getting up, Clint had never sat down to begin with, and Darcy, who jumped on a chair and leaped to the center of the table as if she had been waiting all her life for this moment, pointed to the door dramatically and declared, " _To the Sorting Hat_!"

**

The "sorting hat" turned out to be a web site called "Pottermore", and pretty soon they were all crowded around Darcy's desktop computer as if they were Scooby and the gang helping Velma Dinkley solve a mystery. Steve's protests had been completely ignored, and he had taken a donut with him from the conference room and resigned himself to the fact that he would not get a good night's sleep nor any peace at work until Peggy was satisfied that Voldemort had been defeated once and for all. 

"Oh, how adorable," Peggy said. "What pretty little animations."

"Yeah, once we sort you you can find our what your wand base is and your Patronus. My Patronus is a Jack Russell terrier," she informed Peggy proudly.

"That is...oddly specific," Peggy laughed. 

"Mine's a damn weasel," Natasha grumbled, leaning over the back of Darcy's chair. "Why am I a weasel?"

"Cause you're thin and ornery," Bucky said, nipping at her ear. She swatted at him. "I'm a horse."

"You're a horse's ass," Natasha corrected, but she smirked and let him nuzzle at her. Peggy rolled her eyes, but good-naturedly, while Steve looked out the window and tried to think of how many hours were left in the day before he could go home and collapse back into bed. 

"Okay, Agent Carter, here we go," Darcy chirped. "Just answer honestly, okay?"

Peggy rolled a chair over to the desk, displacing Clint, and sat. Steve found himself interested and delighted by her answers to the web site's questions, despite his best efforts to look like he was not listening; neither Bucky nor Natasha was fooled by his attempts to continue acting annoyed. Clint and Darcy were oblivious, too busy listening to Peggy.

"Why isn't anyone in the conference room?" Tony Stark asked, wandering into the bullpen leisurely. As always, a flicker of light could be seen from the arc reactor beneath his black t-shirt. "I worked really hard to only be ten minutes late, and none of you guys were there."

"More important matters at hand, Mr. Stark," Darcy said in a very businesslike tone. "We're sorting Agent Carter into her Hogwarts house."

Tony perked up. "Hey, awesome! If you're cool, you'll get sorted with me. Best house in all of Hogwarts."

"Don't listen to him, he's a Slytherin," Natasha said. "Because of course he is."

"Damn right," Tony said. "And the books even say how prominent the Slytherins have been over the years."

"Prominent for being _bad guys_ ," Bucky said. 

"Bad guys?" Tony asked, grinning. "Or misunderstood geniuses?"

" _Bad guys_ ," Bucky reiterated definitively, as Clint chuckled.

"Makes sense, Stark. Through ruthlessness to victory."

"I like to think it's through determination to success," Tony said, unruffled. "Hey, Aunt Peggy, are you done with the quiz yet?"

" _Yay_!" Darcy cheered, bouncing in her chair. "I knew it! I knew you'd be a Gryffindor, Agent Carter. That's you all over."

Peggy smiled. "Well, that's fun! I thought perhaps I might be a Ravenclaw."

"Nah," Clint said. "Your sense of justice is way too single-minded to be a Ravenclaw, Peg. You'll stand up for what's right even if the world is burning down around you."

"Nothing wrong with that," Steve said from the desk across from the one Darcy was using, and Peggy glanced at him; they shared a smile for the first time all day. 

"You're kind of reckless, too," Bucky said. "I heard once you fought some brainwashed Winter asshole and stabbed him with his own knife. What a jerk."

Peggy and Bucky shared a smile, and Steve felt in a rush the purity of his love for both of them and how grateful he was that after all they had been through their lives had been sorted into this odd, wonderful shape. 

"Without waiting for backup, I might add. Ravenclaws would have waited for backup. _We're_ more practical," Natasha said smoothly, flicking a finger back and forth like a metronome between herself and Clint. " _We_ are clever."

"And make dick jokes in front of the entire school," Clint exulted with a smirk. " 'Wit beyond measure is man's greatest treasure', right? You see, Shakespeare said, 'the length of a man's wit'--"

"I'm well aware, Clinton," Peggy said dryly, but her eyes were dancing.

"I _bet_!" Clint countered, and Steve, who had been ready to smile at Peggy's deft deflection of Clint, felt his ears burning when her eyes skipped guiltily to him, twinkling.

"Knock it off, Clint," Steve said, unsuccessfully fighting a blush. "Go get matching scarves with Natasha or something."

Darcy brightened. "Hey, yeah! Agent Carter, you need a scarf, so you and the Captain can match."

"We don't match," Peggy scolded playfully. "We're not the bloody Bobbsey Twins."

"I don't have a scarf," Steve said, feeling as though his ears were just melting at this point. He did not want to discuss this.

Unfortunately, Darcy spun in her chair. "What do you mean, you don't have a scarf! You'll look so cute in one!"

Bucky was laughing now. "Aww, yeah, Steve, you'll look so _cute_ in the Gryffindor colors. Hey, if I get one maybe we can eventually put together a whole Quidditch team!" 

"Oh, you _would_ be a damn Gryffindork," Clint said to Bucky, who immediately said "Damn straight. Howling Commandos are the bravest of the brave, Barton."

"He's not wrong about that," Peggy said, and there was a rather cute note of smugness in her voice.

"It's all right," Natasha said comfortingly, stroking Bucky's shoulder. "I'll still sleep with you, anyway. Even though you're a Gryffindor."

"Hey!" Bucky said, while Steve protested, " _No_ scarves."

"Don't you want to show your house pride?" Clint laughed.

Steve set his jaw. There was just no avoiding it, he reasoned ruefully. "Look, I'm in a different house, okay?"

This made everyone stop and pay attention to him, which was exactly the opposite of what he wanted. "What?" Natasha said. "Don't tell me you didn't land in Gryffindor."

"Come on, if _I'm_ a Gryffindor Steve _has_ to be a Gryffindor," Bucky said stoutly. "He's as close to courage and chivalry as you can get without actually being Godric Gryffindor."

"Don't forget the short temper," Natasha said helpfully. Steve glared.

"And the obsession with justice," Clint said. 

"Drop it," Steve warned. 

"You can't be a Slytherin," Darcy declared, as if Steve had told her he turned into a werewolf on the night of the full moon. "I will give up my faith in literally _everything_ if _Captain America_ is House _Slytherin_."

"There is nothing wrong with House Slytherin," Tony informed the group. "Unless, you know, you hate geniuses who are great at everything."

"It's not a big deal, okay?" Steve said. 

Peggy tilted her head and gave him an affectionate look. "Steve, they're only books. Whatever house you are in is fine," she promised, and Steve realized all of a sudden how incredibly lunatic the conversation was--a bunch of super-powered human beings sitting around a computer arguing over imaginary dormitories they would be placed in in a fictional universe peopled by wizards. "And Darcy, there have been plenty of influential, clever Slytherins over the years and plenty of reckless, foolhardy Gryffindors."

"Thanks, Aunt Peggy!" Tony said cheerfully, and she went so far as to tip him a wink.

Steve smiled at Peggy. "Thanks, Pegs. Maybe we should actually, you know, wrap this up and get to the--"

It would even have probably worked, if Tony hadn't figured out what everyone should have guessed sooner. 

"Oh my God," he chortled as if the thought had just struck him and it was the funniest thing he'd ever considered. He turned to Steve. "You're a _Hufflebunny_ , aren't you?"

Steve was no longer sure he even _had_ any ears.

Darcy, on the other hand, lit up like a slot machine that had just clunked to a halt on three sevens. "Really?" she squealed, curling her hand up into an approximation of a paw and holding it out to him as though she wanted to bump it against his. "Cap, high paw!"

Peggy was grinning, and Steve had to fight not to be charmed by her delight at this turn of events (which was also partially a relief, as he did not want their apartment to become a place of ridicule for the next week or so). "Oh, darling, I think that's lovely. Have you a patronus yet?"

"You _have_ to say that so he doesn't _feel_ bad," Tony snorted. "I love it. This makes perfect sense. It's a rabbit, isn't it? Tell me it's a rabbit. Or a _mouse_."

"It's a caribou, and shut up," Steve said after getting to his feet and bumping "paws" with Darcy, nostrils flaring. "And I don't feel bad about my house. My house is just as good as any of yours."

"Tell 'em, Cap!" Darcy cheered, throwing her hands up in the air as if she were in imaginary bleachers. "We're _Huffletuff_!"

"Damn right," Clint said, getting into the spirit. "Honey badger don't care. Honey badger don't give a shit."

"It's a _caribou_ ," Steve remonstrated, not sure what pop culture thing Clint was undoubtedly referring to but deciding he would ask Natasha later. Meanwhile, Peggy had murmured softly to Darcy, "Are caribou a good patronus?" and Darcy responded in a poor attempt at a stage whisper, "They are _awesome_."

Tony was having the time of his life, strutting between the desks with a camp flounce. "Look at me, I'm Lord Voldemort. I've got no nose and no fashion sense, and I want to take over the wizarding world. But wait! Ohhh, help! Save me from the _Hufflepuffs_! They might _hug_ me to death!"

"Oh, _please_ ," Steve said, rounding on him. "Let's look at the stats at the end. Hufflepuff? Maybe _three_ casualties--"

" _Spoilers_!" Darcy screamed, covering Peggy's ears--something Peggy would have instinctively thrown Darcy over her shoulder for had she not already been racing to take the same action.

Steve looked guiltily at Peggy, then continued in a whispered hiss to Tony, "--Gryffindor and Slytherin? _Dozens_."

Tony was all set with a retort when he was interrupted by a strident shout from the direction of the conference room.

" _Where is everyone_?!" 

Tony's eyes went wide and he giggled nervously. "It's Pepper. Shit. It's Pepper. Go. Go, go, go."

They trooped back into the conference room to find an irate Pepper Potts standing in front of the tray of forgotten donuts, her arms crossed over her crisp white blouse, foot tapping in her expensive black and white pump. 

"What was it this time?" she asked. "Someone found a Pokemon in the bullpen and you all had to make catching it a team effort?"

"If it was a _Ditto_ , we would have," Clint said, taking his seat beside Natasha. 

Bucky took the chair on Natasha's other side. "What's a Ditto?"

Steve sat down and massaged his temples. "I think I've had enough pop culture for one day. I feel like I need to go home and listen to my records until I don't hate any of you anymore."

"Awwww, is the Hufflebunny upset?" Tony trilled. Steve shot him a glare, but someone was already on it--" _Ow_ ," Tony exclaimed suddenly, scooting his chair away from the person in between himself and Steve. "Don't kick me, Aunt Peggy."

"We had to find out what Hogwarts House Agent Carter is in," Darcy told Pepper importantly, hopping up to sit on the counter where she'd put out the donuts. "That's real important, Ms. Potts. She's a Gryffindor, of course. Did you know Captain Rogers' patronus is a caribou?"

Pepper sighed, pinching the bridge of her nose. "I've been waiting here for almost twenty minutes and this is what you guys were doing. Okay." She took a deep breath, then blew half of it out. "Look, I'm just going to eat a donut, have a coffee and relax. I printed out a file on the new tech for each one of you, so you could reference back if you needed to. You can just read those, and if you have questions you can ask me or Tony afterwards. It's not a big deal. How does that sound?"

Tony blinked, pleased at this idea. "Great thinking, Pep. Nice to see you loosening up a bit, too."

"I have to. Otherwise I will have a stroke, and even though our health insurance is great, I refuse to let you be responsible for the loss of my mental faculties," Pepper told him as she passed out the printouts, the amusement lurking darkly in her eyes but not reaching her mouth. "No matter how hard you try."

Tony smiled adoringly at her. "You complete me."

Peggy was flipping through her printout. "Excellent. This is quite informative, Pepper, thank you."

"Yeah," Natasha said, impressed, as she looked through her own printout. "It was smart of you to think of this."

"Of course," Pepper said airily, walking briskly over to the counter where Darcy sat to select a donut. Smirking at Natasha, she added, "I'm a Ravenclaw."

**

That night, Steve watched Peggy warily as he wearily undressed for bed. She was already under the covers, dressed in a soft red jersey nightgown trimmed with white lace. Rather than a book, she had her laptop propped on her legs and was smiling at the screen. "Where's your book?" he asked. "Not going to read tonight?"

"I _am_ reading," Peggy said happily. "Listen to this."

As Steve listened, she read off the screen, "Hufflepuff is the most inclusive of the four houses, valuing hard work, dedication, patience, loyalty and fair play rather than a particular aptitude among its members."

Steve smiled ruefully. "Peggy--"

"Wait, there's more," she said, putting the laptop aside on the comforter. "Hufflepuff has the least dark wizards out of all the Hogwarts houses. They are accepting of everyone--even Helga Hufflepuff said she would teach all the students she had the same, instead of being ultra-specific the way the other house founders were. And Natasha told me that in the subsequent books I shall meet a few characters she thinks will particularly delight me, and both of them are Hufflepuffs. I don't doubt her for a second, either. There is a lot to be said for those who accept others just as they are, who play fair and are loyal."

Steve smiled at her innocent, sweet happiness with something she enjoyed, and with the effort she was putting in to let him know that the teasing he had endured today had not affected her. "I suppose those things might sound boring to some people."

"They sound," said Peggy, "like a man who never stops trying to do what is right--not to show off or to garner praise but simply because it is the right thing to do. Even if others initially saw him as weak, or looked past him because he was honorable and kind."

Steve drifted slowly towards the bed, touched. "Peggy..."

She pushed the laptop further away from herself and opened her arms to him. "If I cannot be a Hufflepuff, then I am very, very lucky to be _with_ a Hufflepuff."

After a few entirely pleasant moments of kissing and cuddling, she patted his shoulder. "You look tired, darling. Why don't you snuggle up to me and close your eyes? I'll put the light out."

Steve smiled, reaching for her laptop. "A few more minutes. We don't know what your patronus is yet." Peggy's delighted look was worth the extra ten minutes of wakefulness. 

It was a dolphin, and she settled down in his arms after shutting the laptop off without reaching for the new book on her nightstand. Steve slept better than he had all week, curled around her with an arm draped over her waist.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Clint makes a reference to a Shakespeare joke about "the length of a man's wit". That is meant to be about a certain part of a man's anatomy--which makes me wonder if Rowena Ravenclaw was having a bit of a go at everyone when she said that! 
> 
> Clint also makes a reference to one of my favorite viral videos, "The Crazy Nastyass Honey Badger". House Hufflepuff's sigil is the badger. 
> 
> Caribou as a patronus are awesome. They are "one of the strongest symbols of a personal, spiritual journey" and "are very sensitive to the energy around them and spend their lives walking between two worlds." I think that's Steve all over.
> 
> WickedKitteh is amazing for teaching me so much about Hogwarts. I am a Harry Potter fan but a casual one; my knowledge of a lot of things is cursory. I can say this: I am House Gryffindor, and my patronus is a dolphin. I had, however, been hoping for House Hufflepuff, and when Peggy says Natasha tells her she will eventually read about a few amazing Hufflepuffs down the line, she is referring to two of my very favorite HP characters, Cedric Diggory (I _sobbed_ over Cedric, and am neither sorry nor over it) and Nymphadora Tonks (who I wanted to be the instant I read of her). Both are House Hufflepuff. 
> 
> Well, WickedKitteh is amazing for a thousand reasons, some of which help me stay sane! I wish betaing for me came with a health plan.


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